oh no, what we gonna do?
May 14, 2002 10:37 p.m.
Daniel: A Dream, a Den, a Deliverer.Does it sound as horribly cheesy to you as it does to me?
This, folks, is the name of the show I went to see today. And No, I'm not kidding you.
In between my cries of "make it stop mommy!" and holding my mother up as she doubles over in laughter as I sing under my breath, "Oh No! What we gonna do? The kind likes Daniel more than me and you. Oh NO! What we gonna do? We gotta get him outta here!" (Veggie Tales song for all you uninformed people out there), I suffered through animatronic tigers in the Lion's Den (which brings up another point of mine, King Darius would NOT have had white tigers in his lions den in ancient Babylon. He just WOULDN'T), an annoying, flying Satan in a red sequined dress, bad bad bad music (they sang Dem Bones... c'mon folks...), even worse dialogue (For dost not thy name mean God Shall provide? <-- Spoken by a MABYE 12 year old), and the worst... hold your breath folks... people in front of us actually ENJOYING THE SHOW!
Wow, that last paragraph was very confusing to write, and probably more confusing for you to read. I apologize.
So, I can safely say that I will not be returning to Sight and Sound for a long long long long time. Even amazing lyrics like these can't draw me back. "Shalom, Jerusalem, Shalom! [repeat 18 times] SHALOM!"
Next time I want the story of Daniel, Shadrach, Meshach, and Abednego, I will pop in my veggie tales tapes and sing the bunny song with Rack, Shack and Benny or Sing along with the spring onions as the plot to overthrow Daniel in the famous song...
"Oh No! What we gonna do? The kind likes Daniel more than me and you. Oh NO! What we gonna do? We gotta get him outta here! We could throw him in a dungeon, we could let him rot in jail. We could drag him to the ocean, have him eaten by a whale. We could throw him in the Tigris watch him float a while and we'll all sit back and watch him meet a hungry crocodile. We could put him on a camel's back and send him off to Ur, with a cowboy hat without a brim, a boot without a spur. We could give him jelly donuts, take them all away. Or we could fill his ears with cheeseballs and his nostrils with sorbet. We could use him as a footstool or a table to play scrabble on. Then tie him up, and beat him up, and throw him out of Babylon.
Thanks folks, and always remember to spay and neuter your pets!
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